As I left my house yesterday to do errands, it dawned on me. He's having a guy freak out. I reminded myself about a moment Saturday night before venturing out on a real date (dinner and a movie) when we were standing in my kitchen leaning back against the counter. He had his arms around me atop my shoulders and as he leaned in and kissed my forehead he said, "You got me falling for you." Unsure what to say, I simply hugged him a little tighter.I listened to reader comments yesterday and patiently waited to hear from him first. And about 6:30 last night he sent me a text:
"Hey beautiful, how was your day? I miss you so much already, I can't even begin to explain it."
I breathed a sigh of relief. A few texts later he says:
"I'm so sorry I upset you last night, it wasn't my intention and I do apologize..."
followed by:
"By the way, I'm a little freaked out. I'm falling in love with you hard and that's never happened so fast before."
"So am I and I keep trying to talk myself out of it" I say with an 'LOL' at the end.
"I'm not trying to talk myself out of it, I'm trying to talk myself into trying to slow it down, but the harder I try the more it backfires."
So at least we got the root of the problem, which happens to not be much of a problem at all it seems. This will be a lesson in restraint for me, as I realize that for guys falling in love with someone is not the same as being in love with someone. I think as women, we tend to blur that line and make the jump a bit quicker.
So I'll be patient and let it happen organically while pondering the irony that I met this great guy offline in the real world while writing a blog on internet dating.
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12 comments:
Phew, that sounds better! I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you.
Interesting that you mention falling in love vs. being in love. I think you're right- us ladies don't often understand the difference.
Crazy that you met online!
Good job! Patience wins again. Some ancient advice from one who learned the hard way: "Give him enough rope, he'll hang himself." I think that was some clever way of trying to coach patience back in the day. As women we have far more power when we can step back and wait.
Looking forward to what happens next!
Gabby
http://adatingconfessional.blogspot.com
Wow, I give him kudos for being able to admit that to you so early in the game! I say he's a keeper. And kudos to you for being able to hold out and give him some space. I say enjoy this lovely time of falling in love :)
http://lifebeginsat30ty.blogspot.com
Sounds so fun being you right now!!!
hugs
I'm actually surprised that a guy would admit that so early... I think under normal circumstances he would risk scaring the girl off by becoming so attached so quickly. Although, in this case you don't seem to mind, so it's all good.
However, do you think that there really is a difference between "falling in love," and "being in love?" They both seem similar to me and personally never drop the L-bomb until I'm absolutely sure about it.
Tuppence: Yes much better! Phew!
Snafugirl: No, that's the thing, we didn't meet online but on accident in person. :)
Gabby: I will have to remember that. Glad I just waited a bit.
Life: I know, I am pretty amazed myself.
Seductress: I am excited, I'll tell you what!:)
Matt: Typically that would freak me out and I would run for the hills, but I think because I felt such a strong sense of attraction the moment I met him, it's different. You also just inspired a blog post from your question. :)
I'd promptly fall out of love with anyone who put LOL at the end of a text. But that's just me. Apart from that, I'm loving this blog right now.
*Read about my dating disasters at plentymorefishoutofwater*
Danger Danger!!!! Obsession leads to massive expectation which if not fulfilled equals unparalleled pain!
Make sure the house is really what you think before you create a massive mortgage!
Excellent observation about men and women, I look forward to talking to you about this.
Miss you babe
I miss you too and your phone calls while jogging. ;)
I decided that sometimes it's Ok to buy the house even if it may need fixing up. Because sometimes those are the ones that turn out to be the most beautiful.
I totally don't understand how people can see love coming. I don't know that I've ever started "falling in love" with a person. My love isn't so kind; it smacks me in the middle of the face while I'm on the couch eating ice cream and watching a Law & Order marathon. I never ever see it coming. Having said that, because I'm a commitment-phone it's probably better this way.
Good luck! :)
http://ajenaday.blogspot.com
Jen: It's funny because I always see it coming. It's like intuition and instinct. Not sure I want it to smack me when I am eating ice cream though, or I may choke. ;)
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